The unexpected hospital stay

Seven hours after my last post I was in the emergency room at Methodist hospital.  My wonderful daughter had the intelligence and determination to insist that we call for help despite my fever-hazed resistance, and thank-goodness she did.  It was a close call, sepsis and infectious colitis triggered by extremely low white and red blood cell counts; but here we are on the other side of it, healing and hoping and praying for a complete recovery, that the infection clears completely and there is an end to the fever.  And a beginning to the end of chemo.


My chemo has been moved out at least a week, there needs to be some additional healing and time without fever before we proceed.  And there is a new plan for chemo, moving to a less aggressive approach that will hopefully keep me out of the hospital.  12 weeks instead of 8, and chemo every week instead of every other.  More dependency on others to get to chemo weekly, but hopefully I will be stronger and can drive myself to my other appointments soon.  And, I am staying with family for a short while, until I have my strength back.  More walking and exercise is the key there.


And I'm learning more about healing and the role of my mind and attitude.   


I may not be strong, but I can act strong; I may not be healthy, but I can act healthy; I may not be brave, but I can act brave; and I may struggle to be happy, but I can chose to think of happier thoughts and times; because the first step in being the person you want to be is to demonstrate the qualities you wish to have.  And I want to be strong and healthy and brave and happy... for me, but mainly for my daughter, who is all these things and more.




p.s., My daughter and friends are keeping a caring bridge site updated now (caringbridge.org, search on my firstnamelastname).  I will continue to write my blog as I'm able.